The Beauty of Chastity

She discussed my...our...decision with Evan. Of course. First, she was asking him to take an semi-active role in the next year. Second, she wanted to let him know of our decision, regardless of his role. Third, she wanted just to chat with him. Fourth, I think she was excited to let him know of the "change in status."

He was, to say the least, completely supportive. He knows I'm not in competition for him as the "man" or even "male" in Emily's life, she's so fully explained that I'm her girl, not her boy.

"I like holding the key, Emily," she said he told her, "I like being in control of it. I get Sara is your girl, but it's better when the roles are clear."

"A year will be the longest she's ever gone," Emily told him, "actually, it will be more than a year."

"Sounds like a good start," he said.

"Evan!"

For me, it's break from the soul crushing thoughts of masculinity. When Emily has the keys, I often think about it, being unlocked, what I can to to bring that about, earn it, anything. That is, boy thoughts cloud my mind. When Evan has the keys, there's no point at thinking that way. 

Literally, my brain goes from pleasing Emily in hopes of getting the thing I really don't want to being in a state of sexual frustration with my only thought of pleasing Emily to please Emily.

That is, I stop serving her to get what I think I want (release) to serving her because serving her makes me happy.

That actually increases our intimacy because intimacy is the goal, not release. I try to be her girl, only her girl, and we're closer. We're intimate as girls because that's all we can be, all we can do. Again, the soul crushing thoughts of masculinity evaporate.