Condition

You finally worked up the nerve to ask this cute girl at work out on a date, practiced it day after day, got so close to actually voicing the words. On the day you were going to do it, you knocked on her office door. "Addy..."

"It's about time," she said.

"What?" you asked.

"No," she said.

"No...I don't...I mean..." This wasn't going as planned, not at all.

"You were just going to walk in here and ask me out? Are you kidding me?"

"Addy...I...I mean..."

"I'm going to send you a link to a website. There's a product there. Buy it. The small size. Pink. Install it. Bring me the key."

"I don't know what you're talking about," you said.

"You will. Just remember. Size small. Pink. Key. Come back a month after you drop off the key, then you can ask."

"Ask?"

"Then you can ask me out."

You walked out of the office confused but oddly elated. A month? You could ask her out in a month? Then you got the link and saw what it was and you were dejected.

The next day you went back to Addy's office. 

"Did you get it already?" she asked.

"Get it? Are you kidding me?"

"Two months."

"What?"

"That attitude just cost you another month. Two months, then you can ask me out. By the way, the answer will be yes."

"You're crazy."

"Three months," she said.

You turned and walked out of her office. But a week later you were back and brought her the small keys.

"It's installed?" she asked before taking the key.

"Yes," you swallowed.

"It had better be," she said, "you get one chance at this. When you come back in three months, I'm going to check and if you lied, the answer will be no. Never."

"I...I'm not lying," you said.

"No, I imagine you're not. Just so we're clear, in three months the answer will be yes, I'll go out with you, but there will be one condition,"

"What...what is that?" you asked, watching your tone, afraid of the way she gave out months.

"As long as we're dating, the cage stays on."

"You...you're serious."

She stood, pulled up the hem of her dress, exposed the tops of her stockings, adjusted her garter strap.

"Totally," she said. "Totally."